The Ballad of Bad Ideas
Music by Footnote Swan
Spoken introduction to explain this song is about heroes, and idiots,
and the fine and sometimes blurry line between the two.
Chorus:
Sometimes it's best to keep your mouth shut
And let that witty comment go unsaid
Sometimes it's best to keep your council to yourself my friend
Or join the ranks of the smartmouthed dead
A lanceman fighting for the bards guild
Faced an illithid 'cross the field
He found himself struck Mute, so he answered with a gesture
And still the lanceman wouldn't yield.
When his voice returned he asked it
"Is that the best that you have got?"
As his head flew back, his body hit the ground
His last thoughts were "Maybe not."
CHORUS
A lich called Klingsor went down to the guilds
They asked her please to let them be.
She stood and smiled, said "What'll you do about it?"
Master Dark said "Let me see...
I have the power to control you
So stand still while we squash you flat
And look! Here comes Gwion with White Reaver!"
"Ah." She said "Didn't think of that."
CHORUS
Three factions took the field that day
To face the man who'd taken Avalon
One Bear stepped out and we hailed him as a moron hero
For who of us would do what he has done?
He stepped up to the ruler of the Nosta Ka
And boldly he drew his sword
His voice rang out as he laid down his challenge:
(spoken) "You're a great girlie lightweight wuss and my haggis could
have you for breakfast!"
(Silence. Beat)
CHORUS (x2)
All Works are © Original Author
(OC Author - Marianne Wells)