The Widow's Moor

High up on a lonely moor a widow lived alone
In an inn she kept, and while she slept the pillows heard her moan
“For many’s the night a traveller has spent the night with me
There’s not a man in all creation gives content to me!

“For some can manage once or twice, some make three or four
What seems to be the rarity is the man who can do more
I’d give anything to find him in heaven or in hell!”
And as these words were spoken then she heard the front doorbell

(Chorus)
And the wind blew cold and lonely across the widow’s moor
And she never ever turned away a traveller from her door

Then boldly the widow went downstairs, the door she opened wide
And as she did a tall and handsome stranger stepped inside
She gave him bread and brandy and after he was fed
He said, “My dear, now have no fear, it’s time to go to bed

“For I heard you call way down below and I’ve come to see you right
But you must come to hell with me if I can last the night!”
She said, “You randy devil! To this bargain I’ll agree
For hell on earth or hell in hell it’s all the same to me!”

(chorus)

So up they go and jump in bed, the devil’s working well
He thought before the night was through that she’d be in his hell
But when they got to number nine the widow cried out, “More!”
And when the twelfth time came around still she cried for more

At twenty-five the devil felt compelled to take a rest
But the widow said, “Come raise your head and put me to the test!”
At sixty-nine the widow laughed, “Again, again!” She cried
And the devil said, “Well I can see just how your husband died!”

(chorus)

At ninety-nine the devil he began to cry and weep
He said, “I’ll give you anything if you let me go to sleep!”
Before the morning light was on the devil hobbled home
And the widow, still unsatisfied, once more was left alone

But as she lay there on her own she thought of ninety-nine
“If only that old devil could have made it one more time
I’ll call him up again tonight and see what can be done –
With a bit of application he could have made the ton!”

But when she called him up that night no devil did appear
For the first time in eternity the devil shook with fear
He said, “For all the torment I’ve witnessed here in hell
I never knew what pain was till I rang your front doorbell!”

(chorus)

OOC This song is actually called "The Widow and the Devil" and is by Mick Ryan